(4pm) Nice workout.
I got a response from my ad. (Amazing.) (She didn't send along a picture, but her letter sounds nice.)
I wonder if one of the general rules of the conquest game is to not let women know that that is the goal? (Wouldn't the procedure for playing that be somewhat along the lines of:
1. Choose which women you want serving you "the breakfast of champions".
2. Select the behaviors and attitudes you think might turn her on, and accomplish the conquest.
3. Try out the behaviors and attitudes.
4. Drop the one’s that don't work, and keep trying new one’s; until it's either clear there is no hope, or she is sitting on your face?)
(Before I could play that game, I would first have to:
1. Find some way to become comfortable with sexuality. (More trips to Wallace probably.)
2. Learn to be deceptive.
3. Figure out how to tell when to keep trying and when to give up. (I seem to have that one backwards now.)
4. Find some way to collect a selection of behaviors that will work at getting women into bed. (I seem to have all sorts of behaviors that keep them away, but who knows what behaviors one uses to find lovers?))
(I suppose my best bet, at first, would be to be aware of my amateur standing; and set the goal at getting women to spend a little time with me, and worry about the "breakfast" goal after I have mastered the companionship part.)
Well, I smoked a bowl and popped the top on a brew, and now I am sitting here trying to find the courage to call the woman who answered my ad. (It says here that we share some interests, that her name is Sharon, and that she was a little leery about answering an ad in the paper.)
(5pm) I am still trying to find the courage to call Sharon.
Another reason I think that being in love with Erica was just a defense mechanism is that I have always done and said the wrong things, and have pissed her off a lot. (e.g., I have known for years that chasing her will just make her run away; but, every time she has started to get a little comfortable around me, I chase her a little and we are back to tension.)
(6pm) I finally found the nerve to call Sharon. (I decided that if she had enough guts to answer my ad, I should have enough to call her.) (We are going to have a couple drinks Thursday nite at Curly's bar. (Now I will have to figure out where that is. (I haven’t been to many of the bars downtown, and I am totally lost when people talk about the bars on the south side of town.)))
(11pm) Quiet nite of tv. (Nice.)
3-26-87
(10am) I am not too nervous about my meeting tonite with Sharon. (I decided I have to hold onto the idea that I am just trying to find some drinking buddies now, and not even think about the potential of sexuality.) (Find out if she is into drugs, and see if she would be someone fun to party with.) (It would be nice finding some lovers without going to Wallace, but I am not sure that I am ready.)
(1pm) Erica stopped by with lunch and we had a nice visit. (Neat.)