I bs'd a bit more with Gabriella Saturday nite. (She told me a couple of stories about when she has lied to men, to be kind and let them down gently. (Sometimes the truth is better. (Some guys are sufficiently wise to read such signals accurately, but there are a lot of us who just aren't sufficiently skilled to get the message.)))
(11pm) Quiet nite of typing.
8-19-86
(8am) I feel better today.
I stopped and got an ice cream cone today, but I am still unable to work up the nerve to ask Heather out.
(7pm) My excitement for tonite was repairing a flat tire on my bike.
I wrote a nasty letter to my ex today. (When I am spending over $7,000 per year on the kids, I would think I deserve a letter from her now and then telling me how they are. (I have written and asked her to do so, a couple of times, but she just ignores the requests.) (Or is that really too much to ask for?) (I would rather get letters from the kids, but I can understand them being too hostile to communicate with me.))
(10pm) Tonite I typed and then I watched a movie I had rented.
Now tis time to get f'ed up and listen to music.
8-20-86
(6pm) Boring day.
Erica read what I had typed on the book so far, while I was in Bozeman. (Her only comment was that she never knew how much I care for her until reading it. (?) (There is nothing there that hadn't been in letters to her.))
(11pm) Quiet nite of typing and tv.
8-21-86
(7pm) From what I have read, the normal mourning period for divorce is six months to three years, so something is wrong when I am still hung up four and a half years later. (I just don't know how to hurry the healing process along any faster.)
(10pm) Quiet nite of typing. (Nice.)
8-22-86
(10pm) Quiet nite of typing. (Nice.)