Isn't one similarity between f'ing no one and sexual monogamy, that neither fits reality? (Either way, one continues to collect information that shows that reality doesn't fit their fantasy, and then they use that to justify avoiding intimacy and commitment. (The joys of cynicism.)) (And, either way, it isn’t giving others or ourselves the right to be human.)
I think it's possible to find relationships where sexual monogamy is a reality; but I doubt that there is any relationship that is totally devoid of all potential for some moment when one or the other might slip. (One would have to live a very sober, lucky and isolated life to eliminate all the moments when one could get swept away for a bit. (More people may do just that, if the Aids thing continues; but I don't think it's good for people to continue the trend of greater alienation.)) (Another interesting puzzle.)
I don't think I would ever go out looking if I had a monogamous relationship I was happy with (Hell, I don't do it now.); but I wouldn't want a sword dangling over the relationship, ready to fall if either of us got caught up in a moment with another! (The argument that by slipping, one risks killing themselves and their mate, will continue to gain relevance; but it isn’t a disease that is fair to our humanness, and a lot of people will die as a result.)
I have wondered a couple times if Aids might be a form of bacteria warfare that either got loose accidentally or was set loose on purpose. (There are some crazies out there, and one of them might be demented enough to set something like that loose.) (Given human nature it will eventually kill almost everyone, unless a cure is found. (I wonder how many other people the average single person is f'ing indirectly, when they are into the one nite stand phase?))
One woman told me that the reason she f'ed around was that f'ing her husband was like f'ing her brother, and she could hardly stand to do it. (So she would do him half a dozen times a year, and took care of her needs by f'ing strangers.) (She said she especially liked guys who raped her. (She would tease them, she said, until they couldn't control themselves, and then say no.)-(In talking to the guys involved, they knew she liked that game, and saying no; so it wasn't really a matter of them not being able to stop themselves. (But, it did give her the ability to tell herself she had said no, and relieve her quilt.)-(Her sex life began with being raped by her father, so maybe that fits into her puzzle too.))) (Now she has divorced the one guy and married another who gets off on her f'ing whoever he orders her to.)
Samantha said she f's around because Leo doesn't like as much sex as she does, he isn’t very romantic, and he doesn't like giving or receiving oral sex. (It sounds like she is being mostly monogamous lately. (She has become content with the non-sexual aspects of their relationship, and doesn't want to screw it up.))
Sex sure is a fascinating puzzle.
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