(10pm) Touching and being touched would feel real good right now. (I may be too wasted for sex at the moment, but I could really get into foreplay!)
Besides the sensual enhancement, the speed has also made me more emotional. (e.g., tears come more easily.) (Speaking of tears, I watched "Terms of endearment" Sunday nite. (That is quite the tearjerker.)) (My ex used to get highly emotional on speed.) (That one woman who beat Samantha up was wired on speed and JD at that moment.) (Interesting drug, but volatile.)
I am beginning to read a bit again. (I am splitting my time between the
"1986 tax act" and "Gravities rainbow" by Thomas Pynchon.) (For awhile, when I first quit cigs,
I lost the ability to concentrate and read. (Maybe because I was smoking more pot.))
I have been watching "Fresno". (Pretty strange.)
When I looked for books on seduction and failed, I did notice a book about starting with friends to find lovers. (I would sure feel more comfortable with that approach. (At least I have been able to build friendships with women in the past, so I have at least got part of the necessary skills for that approach already.))
Hunter suggested I get contact lenses. (Maybe, if the money ever comes around.)
(11pm) This is definitely a horny combination! (I can see why I have gotten obnoxious in the past when I did it. (I may have pissed off some women back then, but at least I was being honest in expressing my needs.))
After further research I find that I am not too wasted for sex. (Be nice f'ing all nite!)
11-19-86
(Midnite) Note from the ozone: Why do they put the condom dispensers in the men's can at bars, when it's the women who know who is going to need them?
I can definitely consume a lot more booze with speed.
(3am) Still buzzing.
(9am) I didn't sleep much, but I feel mostly ok.
(3pm) Nice workout.
(6pm) Nice walk.
Boredom.
(7pm) I am still amazed that I watched my x-rated video twice last nite. (I was definitely horny.)
(8pm) I have been trying to save money by wearing the same clothes for several days. (I stink, but no one ever gets close enough to know.)
(11pm) I am getting tired of playing solitaire.