I have been thinking some about what they said about depression in "Frogs". (i.e., that depression is usually the result of creating some picture, at the unconscious level, and when reality doesn't fit the picture we get sad. (Maybe mine comes out of having been a romantic and creating a picture, unconsciously, of a relationship with a woman, which doesn't fit my reality? (Maybe I should try and get my unconscious to generate a lot of pictures? (Pictures of me with a lot of women, and pictures of all of them with a lot of men. (That seems to fit reality better.)))))
Note from the ozone: The problem with illusion is that it easily regresses into delusion.
(6pm) I worked some on the poems I have started.
9-30-86
(3am) Quiet nite.
(2pm) I got a letter from Samantha. (She doesn't like "Outlaws and poets".)
I got a hair cut.
I feel like shit.
(6pm) Another advantage of looking for several girlfriends rather than one is that it changes the criteria. (e.g., in looking for a girlfriend I didn't consider women who had children or who wanted them. (But, with several girlfriends, why not one’s who have or want kids? (If they want to just play, that would be neat.) (I can think of a number of women with kids I would like to play with!)))
Perception: When I play I get horny. (For whatever reasons women don't find me desirable, so playing usually means frustration. (I have to find some way to disassociate play from sex!))
Back to poetry corner: