(9am) Tis frustrating being so poor. (I know much of my problem ties back to living in the past and that I have to start living for today, but it’s hard to do much living today without money.)
I told Hunter about my trip to Missoula. (He thinks it might be good for me to get out of town for a few days. (He could be right.)) (He also says that since Erica has a beau, I had better not f around with her. (I can't imagine that happening.)-(And, I would probably fall more in love with her if we did; and I am already having enough trouble moving on, as it is.))
(10am) I suppose one of the issues in my problem with women is my morality. (Tis hard to justify using women when men have hurt so many of my women friends by using them. (Tis frustrating, because sex is wonderful! (Is scratching an itch sufficient reason for taking the risk of hurting a friend? (Maybe prostitutes are the answer?))))
(3pm) A couple of weeks ago at the Paw Sheila commented on how closed off my body language was. (I am not very open and I suppose that is another reason I don't get lucky.)
Samantha's most frequent comment when referring to men who other women find desirable, but she doesn't; is, "Whatever blows her skirt up."
4-26-85
(8am) Last nite was quiet. (I bs'd with Hunter and watched some tv.)
Happy 36 months of being single to me. (I may not be real happy, but I am happier now than when I was married. (I am glad I made that change.))
(9am) According to the gossip at work, the cops are beefing up their pursuit of dui's. (I still think it should be driving while impaired.)
(10am) Quote:
Leibniz-"The human race, considered in relation
to its own welfare, seems comparable to a battalion that marches in confusion in the
darkness, without a leader, without order, without any signal or command to regulate its
march, and without any attempt on the part of individuals to take cognizance of one
another. Instead of joining hands to guide ourselves and make sure of the road, we humans
run hither and yon, and merely interfere with one another."
4-27-85
(9am) Hunter sprang for a bottle of VO and some beer last nite. (I got smashed!)
We cruised through the Sundance and I did some girl watching.
Josh and Julia stopped by and bs'd. (I was so wasted I asked her where all her horny girlfriends were. (Open mouth, insert foot.))
(10am) It occurred to me last nite that I may be interpreting it wrong when women say they don't want to be treated like a piece of meat. Maybe what they really mean is they don't want to be treated only as a piece of meat?
Hunter suggested a new line for me to use at the bar: Guy to gal, "Would you like to play carnival?" Gal, "How do you play that?" Guy, "You sit on my face and I guess your weight."