The three years I have lived here have been strange. (Lots of changes!) (I wonder what will happen next?)
(11pm) Tiredness!
7-16-89
(9am) It cooled down a little. (Nice!)
(3pm) Erica and Linda stopped in for a minute. (Nice!)
My cig consumption is going up. (Oh well!)
(4pm) Lauren reminds me some of Gwynn and Carly. (She seems selfish, loves to go places and do things, likes expensive things, …. (I could never afford her!)) (Maybe the cold shoulder is her way of saying I am not good enough for her? (I don’t think she ever really wanted to spend time with me, and was just using me.)-(Very few people can stand to be around me!))
Erica is pissed at me for shutting down the grow room. (If I could have held on a little while longer I would have had bud, but it didn’t feel right any longer.)
She says Miranda and Joey, and Charlotte and Jim have patched up their relationships again. (Good for them!)
While Erica was in the bedroom on the phone, Linda talked to me some about her feelings and her relationship with Paul. (She says she has made up her mind to split the sheets. (She should cut the cord and let him go. (He will be hurt, and it will take some time to mend, but she might as well start the process.)-(The longer she drags this out, the longer it will be until they can move on and find new loves.))) (She said she was experiencing a lot of guilt about her affairs.) (She should be careful about mixing alcohol and antidepressants! (From what I have read that can trigger an even deeper depression.))
No one is devoid of jealousy, but that is real different from what insanely jealous people like my ex experience.
(5pm) The rain is cooling things down nicely!
(6pm) Erica stopped in to say hi. (Neat!)
I wonder if Ross will manage to maintain his resolve to not take Carly back?
(7pm) Jim stopped by looking for Erica.
(8pm) Miranda stopped by.
(9pm) I have to stop feeling sorry for myself for being poor and start focusing on learning what there is to be learned from solitude!
If I didn’t make a lot of mistakes with people I wouldn’t be alone so much. (I need to learn a lot yet, to be good enough for people!)