(6pm) Nice walk.
(8pm) I took a long hot bath, shaved and put on some clean clothes. (I don't know if I will go out, but it feels nice getting clean.)
11-15-86
(Midnite) I went down to the Hat for a bit. (I wasn't "up", so I sent myself home.)
(1am) Erica dropped in for a bit. (Companionship sure is neat.)
(10am) Laundry day again. (Sometimes I wish I had a washer and dryer at home, but this is often the high point of my social life for the week.)
Tis pretty annoying that they are closing the Hat. (Tis about the only place I go out to, and now I won't be able to go there anymore.)
Tis confusing trying to figure out what to do. (I really don't want to get serious about accounting and spend all my time with it, but I need to make some money and that is my skill. (I need to pay off my ex and put that in the past, a car would be nice, a nicer home would also be neat, I would like to have money to get out and about, ….))
One thing I have to be thankful for is my friends teaching me that there are other things to do besides sitting in the bars all the time. (It has been nice getting back into movies and reading, and I have gained much from this time of solitude. (But, per normal, I have gone too far the other way. (Being a hermit probably isn't what they had in mine.)))
(2pm) Nice workout. (Doing Nautilus seems to be helping me to progress faster. (My goal for now is to get up over a 100 pounds on each of the machines.))
I wonder if a no smoking bar would work?
(8pm) Another tv nite.
I ate four more x-tops. (There are a lot more potent versions, but I prefer to take x-tops so I can experiment with the dosage.)
Maybe the trick to building friendships with women that have a potential to grow into more is simply to not be whining about my undesirability. (Be happy and "up" and accepting of whatever comes along.) (I suppose that it's tiresome to hear someone bitch all the time, and my saying I am undesirable may be part of why they think I am.)
(9pm) Random thought: I haven't been tickled in years either. (I wonder if I am still ticklish?)
(11pm) I am really getting into the sensual aspect of the speed.
11-16-86
(Midnite) Well, I have lived in Missoula one year today. (And I still haven't made one new friend. (Pretty poor showing.))